Let's be honest - we live in a world where lying and cheating aren't unusual, and misrepresentation of someone's words is an acceptable form of debate (especially in the political arena). Yet we still manage (somehow) to make our society function... though by the news it sure looks like there's more sand than grease in the gears.
One of the things we learn along the way (or are told) is that honesty is its' own reward. Well, it's good to tell yourself that when you pass by the honor snack bar over in B-25 and drop in your 50 cents for the candy bar you snag. After all, if you pay for the candy bar, whoever is running it will buy more candy bars - ensuring there will be one later when you pass by again. Sure, you could take the candy bar without paying - and I'll admit to having done that a couple of times when I didn't have the cash on me - but then I pay for three when I go by again and get another candy bar. This soothes my own sense of honesty and fair play.
I think, sometimes, that I've got an overly developed ethical sense. Part of it comes, I think, from screwing up pretty badly along the way and trying to make amends, part of it from being excessively critical of my own actions in the present. (It's one of the things I wish I could crank down sometimes.) Part of it also comes from a sense that how I act when the little guy ISN'T watching is just as important as how I act when he IS. And if I don't have the habit of honesty when he's NOT around, I'm going to be dishonest sometime when he is. And he's going to see that.
I don't want to fail him like that.
I know the world will fail him soon enough. When he gets old enough to comprehend our political system as it is instead of how it's portrayed in our school books, he'll look at what goes on and hopefully understand that the people we elect to office are human beings - with all the faults and foibles that come with the territory, as well as the virtues and moments when the right thing is done even if it turns out to be an immediate disadvantage for the doer. (There's been a number of times in the last decade when I've corrected salesfolk when I was undercharged for some items - sometimes even when Aaron's been with me.) Doing the thing that's right can be costly sometimes, and you'll not get much appreciation for it. In politics the expedient thing seems to win out over the right thing a lot of the time, with the politician being able to tell himself it's the 'right' thing. But I have a hard time lying to myself like that.
And the school he's in - it's not representative of the world at large, or even the school system. Kids aren't allowed to namecall, be nasty with each other, or engage in the petty cruelties that are the norm in public school when the teacher isn't watching. Eventually he'll be out of it, and then we'll see what we've managed to teach him morally. Give him small examples of virtuous behavior - and perhaps when he's tempted to do the wrong thing he'll instead do what's right... even if it doesn't gain him much advantage.
So I can't slip when he's watching... or even when he's not. A man is made of many things, of many moments, of many choices and the consequences thereof - and what may seem trivial to one man is a source of regret and semi-constant atonement and amends for another. I owe it to the little guy to be the best example I can - because what other role models for fatherhood does he have?
J.